This layed back, quiet gal popped her top. . .blew her lid. . .she yelled.
It doesn't matter at who or why. She just felt terrible. Yes, she was provoked, and she didn't handle it well. She bent her head down on the steering wheel. This gal's purpose in life is to live her life pleasing her Lord. She felt she had failed this day. She cried tears of anger, tears of frustration, and then tears of remorse. She cried out "Lord!"
And in an instant, His presence was thick inside that car. She felt His arms wrapped around her, cradling her, with gentle, hushed tones of "Now, Now. . .there, there."
"I'm so sorry Lord! Please forgive me!"
"You see these scars from nails? You accepted them long ago. What do they mean to you?"
"I'm. . .forgiven."
"Yes. I am your Redeemer."
"You restore."
"Yes, I am also your Yahweh -Jireh, your provider."
"Yes, You give and give and give to me every day. . .thank you!"
" I am your Yahweh-Rophe, healer of wounded hearts."
"Yes, You've healed in so many ways. . .thank you!"
"I am your Yahweh-Nissi, where you find hope every day."
"Yes Lord, You are my Hope every day. . .thank you!"
"I am your Yahweh-Shalom, live in peace with me."
"Yes Lord, in You, I live in peace. . .thank you!"
"I am the Almighty, Elohim, rest in me."
"Yes Lord, I rest in You. . .thank you!"
With each declaration, her heart slowed down and came to a rest. "My times are in your hands."(Psalm 31:15) And my days, my hours, my minutes, my seconds. Peace came into this gal's heart, the peace not from circumstances but from knowing and trusting God, the peace that surpasses all understanding.
He knows the beginning, the end and everything in the middle. It didn't surprise Him this day, that His daughter blew her top. And He came into that car and let her know she was still loved and cared for and that her loved ones would be too. She relaxed in that incredible peace.
Now this emotional gal cried tears of joy. . .tears of thankfulness.
She sat up straight. She sends a text of "I'm sorry!" She receives one back with the same words. He is in the Lord's care and she knows there is no better place. Tonight she will sleep well. And tomorrow will begin a brand new day.
"Yahweh will fight for you; you need only to be still." Exodus 14:14
I belong to a Holy God and He dwells in me.
Dear Lord,
Forgive me when my sin nature falls and thank you that You see me as Your daughter, standing right next to you, an incredible position to be in! I never want to leave your side. The gratitude I feel, I feel I cannot adequately express, and yet I know You know my heart. You are there. You are at home and I am at home with You.
Your banner over me is love. May I wave this banner of love over all around me, especially the ones who cause my top to blow, especially the ones who need it the most.
May they see You in me and feel this incredible love that only comes from You. Even in those moments that are not perfect, You can perfect the moment. Thank you for who You are and that You are mine and I am Yours.
Forever grateful,
Your daughter
"To the Lord I cried aloud and He answered me."
Psalm 3:4
1134. quiet time in the car
1135. hearing from all sides of my Lord
1136. knowing that not being perfect is ok
1137. provisions in more ways than one
1138. wounded hearts healed
1139. having hope for today. . .and for tomorrow
1140. living in peace. . .even in the hard days
1141. pure rest
1142. being loved by my Lord, even when I am unlovable
1143. the words, "I'm sorry"
1144. experiencing Him perfect an imperfect moment
1145. getting back up after stumbling
1146. banners of love
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7 comments:
Hi Kristin,
Sounds a bit like me! I often wonder if God grows weary of me coming back and asking for forgiveness over and over but....thankfully God is not like that. We are instructed to keep on asking...keep on seeking...keep on knocking; He doesn’t count the times! :)
Blessings and hugs,
Denise
So good to be reminded.
I didn't blow my top, but I had the same kind of experience out on my porch swing one day last week. Tears of heartache over my sin, tears of frustration over situations I seem unable to change, tears of desperation calling out for my "Daddy". And He came. He responded. He wrapped me in His strong, comforting arms and peace enveloped my aching soul. I am forever grateful for a God who cares, loves unfailingly, and restores so graciously.
Oh sweet Kris, I have blown it so many times this week. My stress level has been through the roof in regarding our difficult situation. My family has suffered for it.
I thank God for his grace. Oh, what would I do without?
Thanks for this wonderful post.
Love this picture of letting go, receiving forgiveness and NOT replaying the argument again and again in our own heads!
I was directed to your blog by my friend Tracy Teppler - and I am so glad I did. I love your honesty and raw confession of you and your life and your struggles, etc. Thank you for this and for the encouragement and reassurance that we are human - we are forgive, we are loved. God bless you.
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