Dreams and Toilet Paper

On this day, I made the most exciting and important trip I've ever made to the post office. . .and the scariest! Why? Because I was mailing this. . .

 

This man wrote a book that changed my life.

It led me out of a comfort zone.

It was the start of new ministries.

It was a piece of healing.

 

Then it led to another book being written by me

something I had never done

but it was a call

and then a dream.

 

Two years in the making

and now it is done.

This man who wrote the awesome book,

says he will now read mine and write something for it.

I've been on cloud nine ever since.

That was a dream of mine, now becoming a reality.

 

As I traveled down the road to the post office

I found myself dreaming. . .

dreaming of seeing my book on the shelves of stores,

I could see book signings

and interviews.

I could see a movie on the big screen

and then. . . .

 

God reminded me I was down to one roll of toilet paper in my house.

Two bathrooms and one roll. . .not good.

Yes Lord, you humbled me. Thank you.

 

After the post office, it was off to Wal-Mart.

 

All kidding aside, (although, I really was down to one roll)

As I wrote at the end of the book,

this book is not mine,

it was not scripted by me.

Only God could do what He did.

I just had the privilege of being there,

and I had the privilege of writing it down.

 

I don't know if Mr. Author above will like my book.

I don't know that it will be published.

But I do know that I was called

and with fear and trembling, I obeyed.

And that is a good feeling.

I am humbled how God talked with me

and walked with me

and guided my every step. . .

 

through the process of book writing

and reminding me of my lack of toilet paper!

 

It could be scary creating something for the world to see. It could be scary sharing the journey with the world and then it not coming to fruition. But I'm not scared anymore. Whatever happens with the book, I'm ok because it is in God's hands and always has been. That is the best place for it to be, and for me and for you!

 

"Do not fear, for I am with you;

Do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you;

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Isaiah 41:10 

 

. . .in God I trust and am not afraid. . .

Psalm 56:4

 

Do you have a dream that you're scared to follow?

Put it into God's hands and be not afraid anymore.

 

Editing the Tongue

*One of my homeless friends that I care about, fell into the "stuck foot in mouth" syndrome with another one of my friends. Hurt happened.  He has much to learn. . .don't we all?  I thought I would take this story to him and read it.  I pray it speaks to him. I also heard the other day in a store a mother berating her small child.  There was hurt.  I hurt and I didn't even know them. Oh how destructive a tongue can be!   To spew hurt or to sing praise, to give wisdom, or to be silent?  Something we answer every day.  May we give God more control of this tiny instrument in our mouths than we give ourselves.  May we think before we speak. . .(talking to myself here too). . .*

Editing

 When I write stories, they become edited before I feel the words are just right. Oh, if only we could edit the words that come out of our mouths. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “Open mouth, insert foot.”  What a terrible feeling!  For the person with the foot in their mouth and the other who was the recipient of the words that put it there. 

            About a month after giving birth to my second child, I was walking down an isle of a grocery store, when a sweet, older lady walked up to me, smiling, and asked when my baby was due.  I envisioned one of those cartoon balloons over my head that said, “Well, the first one about 5 years ago, and the second 4 weeks ago.”  But the lady was so sweet I couldn’t bring myself to be sarcastic, so I let the balloon pop.  I told her the truth that I had just recently had the baby and I just hadn’t got back in shape yet.  OOPS!  Awkward moment!  She didn’t mean any harm, she was a grandmotherly type who thought she had eyed a young pregnant girl and came to me with that grandmotherly twinkle in her eye. 
 

            What about words spoken in anger?  I bet a lot of us have regretted words that we’ve said in anger, hurt feelings, with our impatience.  Wouldn’t it be great if there was an edit machine in our brain that engaged before our mouth did?
 

            In Matthew 12:36, Jesus says to us, “But I tell you that men (and women) will have to give an account on the Day of Judgment for every careless word they have spoken.  For by your words you will be acquitted and by your words you will be condemned.”  He’s telling us what we say reveals what’s in our hearts.  If we are believers, the Holy Spirit will convict us when we have used wrong words (in one way or another) and we can repent and be forgiven because of that incredible gift Jesus Christ gave us. 
 

            I think the “open mouth, insert foot” syndrome is not a deliberate act of sin, just carelessness.  Since we don’t have an editing machine in our brain, I think we just need to be slower in our speech and sometimes it’s best to remain quiet.  We are told in Proverbs 13:3, “He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.”  Proverbs 15:4 says, “The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.”  Such power in our mouths!  I’m so glad God forgives the repentant sinner and will give us the strength to be self-controlled with our tongue. 
 

            There is a difference between a deceitful mouth and a careless one but both can hurt.  If we are on the receiving end of a deceitful mouth, I find the best weapons of defense are prayer and forgiveness.  If we are on the receiving line of a careless, foot in mouth that caused hurt, praying and forgiveness as well. If a  comment is given as the sweet lady above gave, I find laughter is the best medicine.  If we can laugh at ourselves, the world is so much brighter! 
 

            Proverbs tells us that the controlled tongue will think before speaking, knows when silence is best, and gives wise wisdom.  I think in order to have this kind of tongue, a silent dialogue has to be going on continually with our Lord and being open to Him guiding us. 
 

            I believe we have an editor in our self after all.  Will we use it (Him)?

           

“Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”

Colossians 4:16

  

*the stuck foot in mouth man and friend are ok. One said the wonderful words, "I'm sorry" and the other offered the wonderful words of forgiveness.*

linking with

 

Love in Purple

Purple here, purple there, purple, purple everywhere. . .tops, dresses, bands and lipsticks. Where O where could I be?

Liz Lyons memorial service. Purple was her color. Love and grace was her game. No, not a game, it was her life.

I wasn't one of the closest ones there to her but we did sit close in church every Sunday morning. We had wonderful chats just before service and usually shared a great big hug before sitting down.

I commented on her beautiful, purple lipstick one morning and said that it could put some wild lips on someone. She grabbed my arm and layed one on my cheek.

 

We laughed so.

I wore purple lipstick to her memorial service in honor of her. Not quite as purple as hers but as purple as I could get.

Her service was filled with family, friends, co-workers, prayer partners, students, friends from way back and friends up further on the time line. No matter who they were or when they were in Liz's life, they all had one thing to say. . .She was full of love, full of grace, full of mischievousness , laughter, and life. She never had a husband or children of her own, but her life was quite full of loved ones.

We heard beautiful music, beautiful poetry, beautiful stories and last but not least. . .we heard from her. Yes, she was there on the big screen sharing her testimony for all of us to hear.

And the one thing that stood out above all else from her. . .She loved the Lord. OH, she loved her Lord and she wanted everyone else to know and love Him and to know that love He has for us. Even in her years of cancer, she glowed with that love. It came up from her soul and through her eyes right onto you.

As I ponder, I think about this Lord she loved. This Lord I love. And you too. He is royalty. The color purple represents royalty. Maybe this is why she liked the color so much. She was wearing His colors. She was representing Him, but she didn't need the color. She represented Him with her life, with her words, with her smile, with those beautiful eyes of hers. She wore Him all over.

I prayed as I sat there in the pew, Lord, may I wear You as she did. May others see you in me the way others saw You in her. I'm not like Liz. I'm much more timid and quiet, but I love Him still. You might not be like Liz or me. . .you were created to be just you. But we can all wear Him if we have Him in our hearts.

We don't have to have the purple lipstick on. . .for men, that would be really bad;) . . .but for women. . .it could be really fun. No matter what color we wear, lets wear Jesus. Let His love show through our eyes, through our smiles, through our words, through our hugs. And, if you happen to be wearing purple lipstick, lay one on someone. . .it leaves such a wonderful mark!

 

Liz. . .you left such a wonderful mark on this world!

Thank you!

I'll see you at home.

 

 

You Did Such A Great Job

I write because I don't know what I think until I read what I say." -- Flannery O'Connor

 

When I first read this quote I thought it was funny, but then I pondered. . .hhmmm. . . there is some truth to that.

I wanted the best for my son. . .don't all we mothers want that?

I loved him, played with him, taught him SO many things. I wanted him to have a strong foundation, strong in the Lord, so that when he didn't need me anymore, when he was out in the cold world, he could stand strong and not be blown this way and that.

I cradled him.
I cared for him.
I sang lullabyes and children's songs to him.
I taught him reading, writing, and arithmetic.
I taught him the piano,
I taught him manners.
I taught him about praying.
I taught him about the Lord.
I tried to be a good example.
We laughed.
We cried.
We played.
We talked.
We dreamed.

And then he was gone. Out the door into the dark. He's not back yet. Twenty-five years old and he is gone.

I hear and read where mothers get that wonderful acclamation of 'You did such a great job!' regarding their child rearing. I thought I had done such a good job with him. It didn't seem like a job though. It felt like a privilege to be his mother. I thanked God every day for him and just wanted to do the best I could and enjoy this precious one.  I did...on both counts. But I don't hear those words.

I came to realize that I had to lay down expectations. I had to lay down my son into the Lord's hands. I had to give him back to the One who gave him to me. I give him back Lord. I did the best I could. I pray that you will allow me the privilege once again to enjoy my son. I will wait for Your timing.

I should not need to hear certain words from others, although I've been blessed with a wonderful husband who has blessed me with words. Oh yes, and my mother. . .bless he heart, she blesses me with her words also. Some days that is enough and some days it is not. That is when I go to my Lord who knows what I've done. He saw into the windows of our home, into our lives, into my heart.

This sounds so vain. I do not mean for it to. And this has nothing to do with pride. When you love someone SO much and you've put your all into them and they leave and hurt stabs the heart. . . .sometimes this body of flesh just needs to  hear, and to bleed.

And then my eyes fall onto my other son. He is still here, living faithfully, living with imperfect me, kidding and joking and loving with me. He walks up behind me and lifts me up off the floor and hugs me. I say, "I love you" and I hear back, "Love you too mom". Soothing balm to a heart that still hurts.
And with my eyes closed as my #2 son hugs me and I picture my other precious one in my mind and all the hugs I had received from him in another life time, I hear those words from the One who gives me breath. . ."You did such a great job!"

Aahhh, the gift of love, encouragement, healing, and promises.

 I am so thankful to be sandwiched in between His hope and His promises. I love and miss my sweet one very much but I know God has His eye is on my blue-eyed sparrow and I know He watches over him.

NOTE: I realize there were a lot of I's at the top. I realize that I did none of that without my husband and without the Lord. I did nothing on my own. My blog here is a place for me to feel safe to just let my words fall out. I can do nothing apart from Him and that is well known. Just didn't want this to come across the wrong way with all those I's  ;)

(to the readers. . .I ask for no comments on this post as I am not looking for words of affirmations or encouragements. I have received them from my Lord and I want that to be all I need. As you bloggers know, sometimes we just need to write it out. But you can let me know you were here by leaving me a heart or a smile. I would love to know who came by to visit. If it won't take, you can leave it on my facebook page. Thank you)

A Cup of Warmth and Other Things

I wake in the morning, chilled.

 

My skin covered in goose bumps.

 

Holding onto a hot cup of coffee, sometimes tea, 

 

feeling the warmth of the cup in my cold hands,

 

steam rising onto my cold nose and cheeks

 

is so comforting.

Quiet time with my Lord

 

thanking him for hot cup of liquid

 

warming my face with steam,

 

warming my insides as it slides down my throat,

warmth beginning to flow all over.

 

Beginning eucharisteo for the day

 

thanking my Lord for all, big and small

 

grateful for not only things

 

but for time with Him, King of Kings

 

who wants a relationship with me, little me.

 

Sitting at His feet warms my soul

 

and the goose bumps disappear.

 

Holding the hot cup of drink, eyes closed, communion with Him

 

is an experience like none other.

 

Simple, and yet, profound.

 

It's in this moment of steam and warmth and quiet time

 

that peace invades, fills, and prepares.

 

Reflecting and thanking Him today for. . .

#1931 ~ Hot cafe latte
#1932 ~ steam rising on cold face
#1933 ~ warmth in hands
#1934~ peace invading
#1935 ~ quiet communions
#1936 ~ warm heart
#1937 ~ full circle moments
#1938 ~ rejoicing friends and loved ones
#1939 ~ happy dances
#1940 ~ courage over riding fear
#1941 ~ Yahweh ~ the giver of breath
#1942 ~ breathing in and out
#1943 ~ connecting puzzle pieces
#1944 ~ pictures becoming clearer
#1945 ~ a swelled heart from so much gratefulness


I read somewhere that Yahweh is the name God gave himself. When you say it, it sounds like breath. We breathe because of Yahweh, the giver of breath.

Are you breathing in Yahweh? Do you feel the warmth?
If not, close your eyes, and whisper, breathing in, breathing out.
Yahweh. . .Yahweh. . .Yahweh

What are you thankful for?
Keep whispering. . .to Yahweh.
 

 

 

 

I'm Back Cause It's Another Year!

Hey there folks,
 

 

 I fixed up my hair because this is a special day~

It's my hubby's and my 32nd wedding anniversary.

 

 

We had a shotgun wedding. I held the gun like this and he said, "I do." 

 

I keep it close in case he gets any funny ideas about leavin'.

 

I put on my best dress

 

 

 

and shoes just for him.

 

 

Been goin' thru my recipes to see what I can cook for that man o' mine.

 

 

O Possum Cake!

 

 

You think I'm kiddin'?

 

 

Don't ever doubt a Kentucky woman!

 

Nice of the birds to leave so I could get his socks clean

 

whew, a woman's work is never done

 

I hear they have machines that do this for ya. I sure hope I get one for a present!

 

 But I'm sure thankful his feet have been next to mine all these years!

 

 

 

 

Off to the woodpile.

 

 

 

we'll be warm tonight honey

 

 

don't worry hon, I'll have that rick done in no time.

 

 

ooh, a loose hair

 

That's better, but um. . .that ax is not a good accessory.

 

Whew! That's better!

 

 

Well, this chore's all done.

 

Just stretchin' out all the kinks

 

 

cause I gotta stay in shape for my man.

 

 

 

EWW EEY! Neighbors ol' hound dog stinks to high heaven!  she's done rolled in something stinky and dead.  Bella, I love ya but go take a bath!

 

 

 

 

Well hon, if ya see this, Happy Anniversary. 

 

 

 

32 years with ya has brought out the best in me. Can't wait to see what the next 32 years does!

I'm so thankful the good Lord brought ya to me. I thank Him every day!

I love ya honey!

 

Come home quick! That cake is almost done!

We's gots some celebratin' to do!

 

 

linked with

 

 

 

 

The Staff

When my husband goes for walks out by the pond, he always grabs one of his rods, or as he calls them, his walking sticks. It makes him look like a mountain man to me, rugged, strong, surefooted, outdoorsy kind of guy, someone I like to follow. My mountain man of a husband has always taken care of me and loved me through thick and thin, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Just like my Lord and Savior. Psalm 100:3 says,

“We are His people, the sheep of His pasture.” He is the great shepherd who goes ahead of me and points the way, showing me lessons I might not have learned if I did not follow Him and His staff.

The shepherd’s rod was used to protect the sheep from other animals. The meaning of staff is something to lean on, to trust, to support. So you could say His rod protects us, and His staff is something we can lean on, trust in, and be supported by. I can trust His leading. Even if sometimes the paths are rocky and there are holes here and there, just like the paths to the pond.

If I follow my Savior’s leading, I know I’ll be fine at the end. He doesn’t promise a smooth path through life but He does promise to be there with us; He will either go before us, with us by our side, or carry us when we feel we can go no more.

Not all of my paths have been smooth, but He has been there guiding me all along. I can look back on my life and see how He has protected me. He has provided for me. He has comforted me, carried me, and has helped me become stronger.

Although pretty close, my husband is not perfect, yet I can’t help but smile as I see him walking in front of me with his staff and compare how he is like my Heavenly Shepherd; strong, loving, caring, taking the lead and protecting me. This week we will celebrate 32 years of marriage. That's a lot of steps we've taken together. I pray we have many more.

 

Thank you Lord, for being my Great Shepherd and for giving me an earthly one as well.

 

 

“Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”

Psalm 23:4


linking with

 

 

Dancing In the Light, 2

 

My 80 year old mother lives by herself in her home in Oklahoma.  God has blessed her with a wonderful family next door.  A wife, husband and three small boys.  The parents do not speak English well.  My mother learned Spanish over 60 years ago but hasn't used it since. But she is able to say and hear just enough with the mother Maria that they have formed a close relationship over the years.  I think with Maria's mother many, many miles away and cannot see her, she sees my mother as her second one.  I'll share her, it's ok:)

My mother had shared with me how Maria has a plastic flower in a pot that dances when a strong light hits it.  Maria has it in her kitchen window which faces my mothers kitchen window.  My mother looks over there and can see the dancing flower and it gives her that little piece of happiness inside that just makes her smile.  She shared this with Maria.  Some time later, Maria knocked on my mothers door and gave her her own dancing flower.  Now they can look out each other's window and see their friends flower dancing along with their own.

This makes me smile:)  It makes me ponder and picture in my mind how when we let the light of Christ shine down on us, we can't help but dance, some of us literally, and some of us just in our heart, but I bet we all smile. I also ponder about friendships and how special they are.  When we have the light of Christ in our hearts, we want our friends to be happy and one of the best things we can do is pray for them each day, asking the light of Jesus to shine brightly down on them until their heart dances.

My heart goes out to some of my friends right now who need to dance.  And there are days when I need to dance, but the feet are draggin'.  And then later I feel better and lighter and moving in an almost graceful way and more times than not, someone will call or send me a note saying, "I've been praying for you."  I smile and whisper in my mind. . .I know. . .I know. My dear friends, I am praying to the Dance Master for you.

I'm so grateful to serve a mighty, majestic King of Kings God, and how He cares enough to want us to dance. . .and if it takes a plastic flower in a pot in a kitchen window, then that is what He does.  He cares enough about you and me in this great big world full of mess and he brings us to someone's mind that brings them into His presence on our behalf.  He sees, He listens, He cares, He directs, He leads. . .are we following, allowing Him to lead on our behalf?

If you're in the dark, step out onto the dance floor and let the light, His light shine down on you and feel the music of his voice, his love, let it move you, and begin to dance.  He's the best dance partner I know.  Go on, take a spin, twirl and dip and sway to the music. . .are you dancing yet?

 

Part 2

 

A dear sister in Christ that battled cancer for years passed away a few nights ago. She inspired everyone who knew her. She oozed Christ's love. Her closest friends say she is now dancing without shackles. Yes, she is dancing in the Light, with the Light of the world, her Savior, Jesus. Many of you that did not know her, prayed for her. Thank you!

She is free from cancer, free from pain, free from this world. She sang not too long ago,

You can have all this world, Just give me Jesus.

 

 

It makes me smile to think of her dancing with Him now.

Don't you know how happy she is!

 

One day I will butt in. Will you? Do you know someone who doesn't have that dance card waiting?

 

Let's tell them the steps so they can share in the dance.

 

Liz would want that.

 

Jesus calls us to do so.

 

Let the music begin! 

The Video/Imagine

 

 

 

 

 

We are ready to begin our 5th year of collecting donations of blankets, new and gently used, sleeping bags, coats, gloves and caps.

 

Do you have a thermostat to turn on when the air gets chilly?

Do you have a favorite blanket, a coat, a pair of gloves?

Do you have a bed to crawl into at night?

You may not think it's too cold yet, but to the homeless out there in the night, it is.

 

Please watch our video of the Blanket Ministry and imagine that you didn't have any of those things.

http://vimeo.com/75529630

 

 

Please consider donating wherever you can.

Bring a blessing of warmth to where there is cold.

Bring light to where it is dark.

 

Thank you to all who have and who will donate.

You are helping to share the love of Christ in more ways than you know!

 

Thank you and God bless you!

Pray With Me?

Lately, I have seen a lot of ranting filled with worry, filled with anger out on the social media.

I hear words like furloughs and shut downs. I hear confusion. All these emotions I have felt myself.

And so I hit the pause button on my day and hit the ground on my knees, head bowed and I pray to my Lord and Savior. . .will you join me?

"Lord, heal our land, give discernment and guidance to our leaders, to us. Protect our country and may she always be the land of the free. I pray Lord, fill her citizens with peace, provide the provisions for all, help us to trust You and to be content with whatever Your will is to be. Show us when to stand up, speak up, what to say, when to sit still, be quiet and help us to always be willing to accept, "Thy will be done."

In Jesus Name

Amen

 

I hit the play button on my day again and away I go ~ because I know who is in control ~ and He doesn't sit in the White House. . .He sits on a throne.

Reduced To Tears

It's not hard. I'm just like my mother. Sorry mom! It doesn't take a lot to reduce us to tears.

 

Right now it's formatting my book that is making my face tear stained. I'm still not totally comfortable with all the workings of WORD and I have this little. . . ok, ok, BIG fear I'm going to delete. I've done that before with blog posts. But I'm talking about over two years worth of work here. And this formatting is more work than I thought. It's not the work I mind, it's just the shaky hands on the keyboard, the unconfident hands hitting keys and symbols and I'm thinking of thousands and thousands of words that could be gone in the blink of an eye. Yes, I have a back-up on another laptop. I think the breaker of the dam came when someone next to me was saying do this, do that, and I am someone who needs to think a minute, or two, or three before I make changes. After all, this is serious business. I want to do it right. I want to do it well. And sometimes I just need to think longer than the person next to me.

And then there are the pictures. Yes, I have pictures all through out the book and I had them all in place. But the publishers guidelines say the manuscript needs to be double spaced and all paragraphs indented. That's no problem. . .until it comes to the pictures! Changing the movement of the words is throwing the pictures all out of whack and I don't know what I'm doing.

Maybe I'm thinking this all out too much. I know I'm fretting to much. It's just that this project is so important to me and I have put my heart and soul into it. People have trusted me with their words. I want to do a good job and I want it to bring glory and honor to my Lord.

So, then I ask myself. . .Did God not lead me into all of this? The answer is  "Yes!" I have no doubts about that. Do I trust Him to take this where He wants? The answer is  "Yes!" SO, why am I crying?

Because I am silly. That's the best I can come up with. And because I can control being silly, I will stop it. And I will keep going until this job is done.

What about you? Do you cry over silly things? Please do tell! :)  Do you fret? Will you trust the Lord with me that He is in control and believe that we are just asked to do the best we can? Will you agree with me that we will put one foot in front of the other, keep typing on those keys, formatting those books, parenting our kids, you fill in the blank_______________ with what's going on in your life.

Let's breathe in God's strength and divine power and I'm going to say a "thank you" to Him for putting up with me.  Let's get going!

Just let me go get a Kleenex first to blow this nose of mine and I'll be right there.