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Why a blog from me, someone who has never been a writer, someone who has never been articulate or had a solid grasp of the grammar world. Because God told me to write. Several years ago a life storm invaded my family. God kept telling me to write it all down. I argued, but He would not let up. This went on every day for a couple of weeks until one day out of frustration, (I'd like to say it was out of obedience), I picked up a pen and paper and wrote for 7 hours straight! Do you think maybe I needed therapy and God knew it?

I've been writing ever since and have learned to love it! I started out sharing my stories with friends and family. I've now been published in a Nashville church paper, Our Daily Journey (a devotional site of RBC Ministries), PCCWeb Daily Devotional, Ruby for Women Ezine Magazine, and I am a contributor in the book Alabaster Jars, Life in Abundance Collection 2.

Why Ponderings? During this life storm, God led me to a pond in the woods behind my home. There He met me each time, teaching new lessons, reminding me of old ones, showing His presence and allowing me to feel His love through the surroundings of that pond. I found myself returning over and over to ponder, pray and praise. A healing of my heart took place and out of the experience came my first book, Ponderings From the Pond, then a second book, Ponderings From My Porch, and now a third book is in the works along with a memoir about my storm.

Why am I making myself so vulnerable? Because God has done so much that I cannot keep quiet. I have to share. Jesus's last words to his desciples were, "Go,tell." We are his disciples too and this is just one of my ways of telling.

I'm no scholar but I have heard God's voice in my spirit, experience His love daily, and have a desire for others to experience this also. I would love to share with all who visit and I would love to hear from you. If my sharing gets just one to ponder, to be quiet with the Father, to see and hear from Him or to be reminded of something from Him, then this is worth my vulnerability.

As you visit me, sometimes we will be at the pond, sometimes we will move to the front porch, and sometimes we will just be here, there, and yonder. Thank you for coming and please feel free to come back anytime, you are always welcome here.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14

*****EXCITING NEWS*****

My first book, Ya Know What I'm Say'n, has been released.


Ponderings

Ponderings

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I Went To Jail





There were stools lined up in a very tiny corridor with sectioned off glass panes. A phone on each side of the pane.  You talked on one, the inmate talked on the other. This was my very first jail visit and I told myself to put on my big girl pants that morning as I was getting ready. I looked like a big girl on the outside but I was a not so big on the inside.  There were little kids visiting a loved one through the other glass panes. My friend and I were visiting one of our bridge guests. His eyes were big, tired, sad, pleading as he shared what happened. . .he had been working all day, came back to his place under the bridge and just wanted to eat out of his cooler. . .found two drunk men trying to steal his food. . .he hit one and the guy fell breaking his pelvis. . .he hit the other.  He said, "the poor just do not steal from the poor, that just ain't right. I'm just out there trying to do the best I can."

Greg had said basically the same thing in our visit #2 out at the park. Greg told me that the code of conduct amongst the homeless is that they help one another, but every now and then someone will come in and break that code.

As I pictured in my mind two homeless men trying to steal food from another homeless man, I thought to myself, they're just like wild animals. . .sniffing out food and taking it whether it belongs to them or not.  I could feel the burning behind my eyes, but I kept telling myself, "Be a big girl, be a big girl."  I was.

I believed the man behind the glass pane. I've witnessed him and the other two men and I know none of them are perfect by far. . .neither am I.  Some would ask why I felt the need to go visit. I'm just convinced all the more that we need to be there for ones who have not the Father as their Lord and Savior.  They need to see His reflection looking back at them through those who have the Holy Spirit indewelling in them, even though we are not perfect, we are being made holy through Him. They need to see hope, love, and acceptance. . .not for what they do or don't do but because they are a child made in HIS image and we have the privelege of reminding them of that and showing the reflection of HIS wonderful face back at them. I also believe you can't be a part of a ministry like this and flee when something bad happens. Jesus doesn't flee. Neither should we. We don't learn, others don't learn, if we all retreat back to our corners.

I want to pray that I never have to sit on that little stool and talk into that phone again, but I've learned what I want and what God asks of me is not always the same. I've also learned that when I step out of comfort zones and be obedient to what He has asked of me, I am always so thankful on the other side.  It may not always be easy, it may not always be pretty, but it is always a time of learning for me and blessings always follow. God has been teaching me discernment through listening. I've listened to many others would call rough cut. Greg also said to Keith and I one time, "I know I'm rough around the edges, but God is sanding me down, little by little."  I believe love is the sandpaper.

The man behind the pane said he was so thankful that my friend and I came to see him. He touched the pane with his palm and then touched his palm to his heart. I think God did a little sanding this morning behind the glass pane.


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11 comments:

Susan said...

Love is the sandpaper.

Joy said...

What a great deed. Bless your heart. You are a blessing.

Reformed rebel said...

God is so amazing! Aren't we all a little rough around the edges in one way or another? God bless you and the ministry He has given you to do.
You bless me!!

Denise said...

You are truly amazing.

Kristin Bridgman said...

Thank you. HE is the one who is amazing! To take little ol' me and allows me to be a part of such a ministry. He blesses me left and right! And YOU all bless me left and right. Thank you:)

And yes, Chelle, I have felt the rubbing of the sandpaper myself;) I may say "Ouch" at first, but am thankful in the end because it leaves me "smoothed out" in love.

a joyful noise said...

Your visit was love in action and scriptural to visit someone in "prison." or jail. He appreciated your visit and kind words, and it touched his heart. Thank you for sharing at "Tell Me a Story."

Floyd said...

Wow... What a great story and lesson. God does call us into tough circumstances, not only for the ones we're to help, but as you so wisely pointed out, us as well.

Your obedience is encouraging. That palm God used to sand off some of my rough edges as well...

Nice job, sister.

Audrey said...

Visited your blog for the first time today. I'm so glad that you obeyed the Lord and began writing. Thank you for sharing from your heart.

GLENDA CHILDERS said...

My dad and his wife do jail visits/ministry every week. God is really using them in this dark place.

Fondly,
Glenda

Janice C Johnson said...

And God did some more sanding just now, in front of my computer monitor.
Blessings,
Jan (from SDG)

caryjo said...

This grabbed me:
He touched the pane with his palm and then touched his palm to his heart. I think God did a little sanding this morning behind the glass pane.

It's been quite a while, but I've been in jail/prison to talk to people, walk with them, etc., and it's always been filled with heart-breakingness ... but God "openingness", too. Can only count on that.

Don't want to, don't look that direction easily, BUT, as you indicated, if the Lord calls us to do something, HE is the Boss and we will be filled with blessings by serving Him for the sake of others.

Glad you did well. Truly understand how you felt, how you struggled.