Why a blog from me, someone who has never been a writer, someone who has never been articulate or had a solid grasp of the grammar world. Because God told me to write. Several years ago a life storm invaded my family. God kept telling me to write it all down. I argued, but He would not let up. This went on every day for a couple of weeks until one day out of frustration, (I'd like to say it was out of obedience), I picked up a pen and paper and wrote for 7 hours straight! Do you think maybe I needed therapy and God knew it?

I've been writing ever since and have learned to love it! I started out sharing my stories with friends and family. I've now been published in a Nashville church paper, Our Daily Journey (a devotional site of RBC Ministries), PCCWeb Daily Devotional, Ruby for Women Ezine Magazine, and I am a contributor in the book Alabaster Jars, Life in Abundance Collection 2.

Why Ponderings? During this life storm, God led me to a pond in the woods behind my home. There He met me each time, teaching new lessons, reminding me of old ones, showing His presence and allowing me to feel His love through the surroundings of that pond. I found myself returning over and over to ponder, pray and praise. A healing of my heart took place and out of the experience came my first book, Ponderings From the Pond, then a second book, Ponderings From My Porch, and now a third book is in the works along with a memoir about my storm.

Why am I making myself so vulnerable? Because God has done so much that I cannot keep quiet. I have to share. Jesus's last words to his desciples were, "Go,tell." We are his disciples too and this is just one of my ways of telling.

I'm no scholar but I have heard God's voice in my spirit, experience His love daily, and have a desire for others to experience this also. I would love to share with all who visit and I would love to hear from you. If my sharing gets just one to ponder, to be quiet with the Father, to see and hear from Him or to be reminded of something from Him, then this is worth my vulnerability.

As you visit me, sometimes we will be at the pond, sometimes we will move to the front porch, and sometimes we will just be here, there, and yonder. Thank you for coming and please feel free to come back anytime, you are always welcome here.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14


My first book, Ya Know What I'm Say'n, has been released.



Thursday, May 3, 2012

Oh, How I Prayed. . .

My mother in law passed away recently
so in the car we went
Mom, Dad, and Prodigal
ten hours on the road together
Oh, how I prayed. . .remember

Passing under the Memphis Bridge
passing corn fields and rice fields
the Ozark Mountains and Oklahom Prairies
700 miles. . .Oh how I prayed. . .remember

Him playing on grandma's piano
playing with the cousin's children
eating at aunt and uncle's table
and Oh, how I prayed. . .remember

Seeing dark haired grandma in the beautiful rose casket
family all around
tears falling, hugs all around, comfort being given
Oh, how I prayed. . .remember

Watching him stir rice krispie treats with white haired grandma
all of us telling stories from long ago
he sitting on the front steps playing his guitar
Oh, how I prayed. . .remember

Few words were spoken
but hugs were given and prayers were prayed
small conversations here and there and
Oh, how I prayed. . .remember

700 miles back, ten hours in the car
he and I exchanging front and back seats
he listening to his music and me. . .
Oh how I prayed. . .remember

Did he, you ask?
Does he remember the love of a good family?
Does he remember the grace and mercy he received from the Father?
Does he remember making Jesus his Savior?
Does he remember the dad who taught him all the "guy"things?
Does he remember the love of his mother over the last 24 years?
I wait patiently on the Lord for my trust is in Him and I will choose joy.
Only He and the prodigal know for now
and Oh, how I continue to pray
as only a mother can.

"Our loved ones may spurn our appeals, reject our message,
oppose our arguments, despise our persons---
but they are helpless against our prayers."
J. Sidlow Baxter

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Romans 12:12

Do you pray for someone special to come home?
I have a running list in my prayer journal.  If you would like, I'll pray along with you for yours.


Jen Ferguson said...

This overwhelms my heart and drives me to my knees. I pray that he remembers, that he experiences, and that you have peace in your heart.

Jennie Morgan said...

Made me cry. Continuing to pray with you, my dear friend.

ells said...

Oh Kris...sorry for your loss...but a hidden blessing...so much time with your son...maybe not many words spoken...But God’s love doesn’t need words. He got to be in the presence of God...because you and your husband carry the aroma of Christ. He is still part of my list in my prayer journal...lifting him up along side you. thanks for sharing this...blessings my friend.

Brandee Shafer said...

I'm sorry to hear about your MIL. I'll be praying about your son. Thank you for sharing. I love how you wrote it out in poetry form...

Denise said...

This truly touched my heart, bless you.

Dianne said...

I am going thru the same ritual with my prodical right now...I understand so much what you are feeling. God bless you and give you peace

Anita said...

Thank you for sharing your heart with us Kristin.

I am so sorry for the death of your Mother in law. I pray that your son will remember, and that you will be enveloped in our precious Jesus' arms.

Stacie said...

I was touched by this post, Kristin. May the Love and the Peace of God just wrap you up right now. I pray that God will ease your pain and wipe away your tears. God bless you.

Kristin Bridgman said...

You guys are just the sweetest! I re-read this post and know it sounds very sad. But we have been dealing with this for 6 years. I am not so sad as I was in the beginning and there are not many tears anymore. God healed my heart at the pond you see at the top of my blog. We pray and believe God is working. We have learned to be patient, while praying continually, and go on with life. That's all you can do.
We are strong because He fills us with His strength, Praise God!
I love every one of your comments and sympathy, thank you! You, dear ones, are so special to me!

Reformed rebel said...

Hi Kris. So sorry for the loss of your mother-in-law. Will keep you all in my prayers. It was good that you had that time with your son. I know the Spirit was in the car with you because He dwells in you. While you were praying I have to believe that the Lord was working in him. Will continue to pray.


Quiltingranny said...

Kris I am so sorry for your loss, but another part of me is rejoicing in the fact you and your son did spend wonderful family time together in the wake of sadness. Yes, he remembers. Yes, he knows. But our prodigals must make their own way and all we can do as you know is pray and I am praying for you!

Cora from Hidden Riches said...

Take it from the heart of this once prodigal daughter ----- he remembers! I'd bet my life on it. It's hard to explain the thought processes of a fighting heart. We build fortresses so that we won't cry, and we close doors and pull the shades down so our hearts won't be seen. But it all leaks, and the harder Momma prays, the more it all crumbles. One day, it will all come rushing in on him, all the memories will fall into some sensible order, and he will know. . .! Kristin, this is so precious and heart-wrenching at the same time. I'm still praying with you, my friend!

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

I continue to learn from you. You are an inspiration of how to let your child go safely into the hands of the Father.

I pray that my son will continue to run to back to God. I rejoice that he is seeking the Lord. I pray that the consequences of his actions will drive my little 13 year old to his knees.

Love you, Sweet Sister!

Cecilia Marie Pulliam said...

Beautifully written, Kristen. How we moms pray for our children, our prodigal sons. Praying for yours, praying for God's peace in your heart.

Anna Popescu said...

Kristen, your post utterly touched my heart. Never ever (ever) give up praying about and for your prodigal. I am the mom of a once-prodigal son who finally came back to the Lord after over 20 years. I prayed long and had during all that time for God to bring a godly friend to come alongside him, and also for a godly wife. I still smile when I think how God answered my prayers in such an awesome way. The woman who is now his wife was a 2-fer: a Christian -- friend first and now wife. In fact, my son's exact words to me were: "She's the one God chose to lead me back to the light." And here's the really really cool part: right this minute he is in Albania on a medical mission trip, his 2nd, and the 1st of 2 this year. Just wait and pray... and then watch out because He's got something awesome waiting to happen in answer to your prayers! And I will join you in praying for him too...

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

Thanks for posting...such beautiful words, and unfortunately words I could have pinned myself..thanks for these beautiful words that encourage me to never get off my knees

Connie Arnold said...

This is a beautiful post, Kristin! As a mother, my heart goes out to you. As someone who has also lost a mother-in-law, my sympathy to you. May God surround you with love and peace, and draw you and your family closer to Him and to each other.