Why a blog from me, someone who has never been a writer, someone who has never been articulate or had a solid grasp of the grammar world. Because God told me to write. Several years ago a life storm invaded my family. God kept telling me to write it all down. I argued, but He would not let up. This went on every day for a couple of weeks until one day out of frustration, (I'd like to say it was out of obedience), I picked up a pen and paper and wrote for 7 hours straight! Do you think maybe I needed therapy and God knew it?

I've been writing ever since and have learned to love it! I started out sharing my stories with friends and family. I've now been published in a Nashville church paper, Our Daily Journey (a devotional site of RBC Ministries), PCCWeb Daily Devotional, Ruby for Women Ezine Magazine, and I am a contributor in the book Alabaster Jars, Life in Abundance Collection 2.

Why Ponderings? During this life storm, God led me to a pond in the woods behind my home. There He met me each time, teaching new lessons, reminding me of old ones, showing His presence and allowing me to feel His love through the surroundings of that pond. I found myself returning over and over to ponder, pray and praise. A healing of my heart took place and out of the experience came my first book, Ponderings From the Pond, then a second book, Ponderings From My Porch, and now a third book is in the works along with a memoir about my storm.

Why am I making myself so vulnerable? Because God has done so much that I cannot keep quiet. I have to share. Jesus's last words to his desciples were, "Go,tell." We are his disciples too and this is just one of my ways of telling.

I'm no scholar but I have heard God's voice in my spirit, experience His love daily, and have a desire for others to experience this also. I would love to share with all who visit and I would love to hear from you. If my sharing gets just one to ponder, to be quiet with the Father, to see and hear from Him or to be reminded of something from Him, then this is worth my vulnerability.

As you visit me, sometimes we will be at the pond, sometimes we will move to the front porch, and sometimes we will just be here, there, and yonder. Thank you for coming and please feel free to come back anytime, you are always welcome here.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14


My first book, Ya Know What I'm Say'n, has been released.



Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Ebony and Ivory

I’ve often wondered why God placed my family in Kentucky eight years ago.  So many things have happened since then it’s difficult to put it all into perspective.  The stories we’ve shared, the adventures we’ve experienced have all combined to create a tapestry of life unique to this new home.  I suppose I’ve always possessed a heart for the plight of others and since moving to Kentucky I feel God has challenged me to step away from my zone of comfort and explore new avenues of expression and connection.

Seven years ago I became involved in a ‘Lunch/Hospital Ministry’ with others from my church. Once a week the sack lunches are handed out to family members who are waiting for loved ones in the intensive care areas of the local hospitals.  That simple act of kindness has generated some amazing connections to the lives of ordinary people facing trying circumstances.

It was during those times I met Miss Anna, a 90 year old cleaning lady who worked at one of the hospitals.  God brought this lady in her beautiful ebony skin into my life along side my ivory skin to blend us together into what I hope in time became beautiful music to God’s ears.  I know it was to mine.

Miss Anna touched my life in so many ways with her understated wit and accepting charms.

If you look at our picture, you will see that Ms. Anna and I are like the keys on the piano board…ebony and ivory, sitting side by side, working together in perfect harmony.  Ms. Anna and I shared so much together, especially in these last several months after she went through the loss of her leg. 

Over the months after her amputation, we shared time, smiles, food, stories, grief, laughter, and love.  The beauty of our friendship created music within my heart, giving me much joy.  But there was also beauty in the quiet moments.  It was out of the willingness to sit in the quiet, that our most beautiful conversations were born.  I learned to accept the quiet that so many find uncomfortable for I saw that love was working in the quiet.  Ms. Anna was not a big talker, but by letting the quiet moments happen, it gave her time to think, and eventually love poured out of her towards me like a beautiful song.

Ms. Anna was a real soldier.  To look at her tiny frame, you wouldn’t picture her that way.  Over time I began to ask her questions about her life and she slowly and in little pieces shared with me.  During an era of racial backwardness, she worked hard to help make a living for her family and continued to work up to the age of 90. She never once complained, had a heart of gold, and had much strength in that fragile looking body.  She loved the Lord and that is where she gained her strength. 

She had a harmony about her that few may ever find in their own lives.  A harmony like the blending of beautiful music…like a piano with its ebony and ivory notes.  Love, like music is a universal language ALL understand…hhmmm, pondering…

Several months before her amputation, Miss Anna went to the doctor to look at a growth on her foot.  It wasn’t good and no amount of treatment would cure it.  Reluctantly, she agreed with the doctors to have her leg amputated…fully expecting to return to work as soon as she could get up and about.  Initially her spirits remained high and when I would visit her in the hospital she would light up, but over time her spirit began to fade.

Eventually they moved her to a nursing home and even though I visited her every week, I could tell her spirit was declining even more. When she was told she would never be able to go back to work, she lost her will to go on. This week, a year ago the Lord brought her home.

I’ve known Ms. Anna for almost 7 years but it wasn’t until this last year  she gave me a nickname.  I was so tickled the first time she called me Baby Doll. . .it was also the first time she said she loved me.  A nurse at the nursing home asked one day while I was there how Ms. Anna and I met.  Ms. Anna piped right up saying that we had fallen in love with each other years ago at the hospital. I am so blessed that we could hold hands, eat together, share our stories, pray together to the same God who created us both and loves us both, sacrificed for both of us, and has prepared a home for both of us with Him. Maybe we can sit on each others porches.  Or, she could skip to a pond with me if there is one.

Just coming off of Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I can’t help but be saddened at thinking of all the past dissention between ebonies and ivories.  Many never learned how to blend together to live in harmony.  Many beautiful moments were lost, or never happened because one could not see the beauty of the other. I believe and hope it is much better today and will continue so one does not lose out on their own beautiful song God may have for them.

I love old hymns, and there is an old negro spiritual that I found recently that I believe puts our relationship into perspective.

In Christ There Is No East or West

In Christ there is no east or west, in Him no South or North; but one great fellowship of love through-out the whole side earth.

In Him shall true hearts everywhere their high communion find; His service is the golden cord, close binding all mankind.

Join hands, then, brothers of the faith( and sisters too) what-e’er your race may be; who serves my Father as a son is surely kin to me.

In Christ now meet both east and west, In Him meet south and north; all Christly souls are one in Him, through-out the whole wide earth.  Amen.

Ms. Anna, Our souls are one in Him. . .You were a beautiful song!
We will meet again. . .I love you
Your Baby Doll


Jennie Morgan said...

Kris, I laughed out loud when I first read the title of this blog because I knew right where you were going since there was the picture of you and Ms. Anna. But, as I read the blog, I got all tearful just thinking about the sweet relationship you developed with her and the blessing it was in both of your lives. Because I have such a love for music, I really enjoyed all the analagies you drew from music. And how true it is that life can be filled with harmony as we learn to love, appreciate, and walk alongside folks of all colors. Together we all can make beautiful music! Thanks for this sweet blog. And thanks for sharing Ms. Anna with all of us. I know my special gentleman friend only has a short time to live, and my heart will be very sad when he's gone, but I, too, am enjoying the sweet times we share each week as I visit him. I pray that I will be the same kind of sweet, kind elderly person that people will enjoy spending time with in my last days!

Maryellen said...

How precious you were, baby doll, to Ms. Anna and are to so many others, including me! Ditto to Jennie's comments...I could not have said it any better. I love you and not only consider you my BFF, but I know that as sisters in Him, forever really does mean forever.

Ruth Hudson said...

So sweetly written this tribute to your friend! I am blessed that you are my precious friend and that you let me glimpse into your heart and soul through your "Ponderings".