Why a blog from me, someone who has never been a writer, someone who has never been articulate or had a solid grasp of the grammar world. Because God told me to write. Several years ago a life storm invaded my family. God kept telling me to write it all down. I argued, but He would not let up. This went on every day for a couple of weeks until one day out of frustration, (I'd like to say it was out of obedience), I picked up a pen and paper and wrote for 7 hours straight! Do you think maybe I needed therapy and God knew it?

I've been writing ever since and have learned to love it! I started out sharing my stories with friends and family. I've now been published in a Nashville church paper, Our Daily Journey (a devotional site of RBC Ministries), PCCWeb Daily Devotional, Ruby for Women Ezine Magazine, and I am a contributor in the book Alabaster Jars, Life in Abundance Collection 2.

Why Ponderings? During this life storm, God led me to a pond in the woods behind my home. There He met me each time, teaching new lessons, reminding me of old ones, showing His presence and allowing me to feel His love through the surroundings of that pond. I found myself returning over and over to ponder, pray and praise. A healing of my heart took place and out of the experience came my first book, Ponderings From the Pond, then a second book, Ponderings From My Porch, and now a third book is in the works along with a memoir about my storm.

Why am I making myself so vulnerable? Because God has done so much that I cannot keep quiet. I have to share. Jesus's last words to his desciples were, "Go,tell." We are his disciples too and this is just one of my ways of telling.

I'm no scholar but I have heard God's voice in my spirit, experience His love daily, and have a desire for others to experience this also. I would love to share with all who visit and I would love to hear from you. If my sharing gets just one to ponder, to be quiet with the Father, to see and hear from Him or to be reminded of something from Him, then this is worth my vulnerability.

As you visit me, sometimes we will be at the pond, sometimes we will move to the front porch, and sometimes we will just be here, there, and yonder. Thank you for coming and please feel free to come back anytime, you are always welcome here.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Psalm 19:14


My first book, Ya Know What I'm Say'n, has been released.



Monday, January 31, 2011

One Thousand Blessings, Gifts, Unwrapped Love

As a fairly new blogger, I’ve been roaming around the blogging world looking for like-minded bloggers and came across a beautiful site of a Christian author.  I ordered her book, but noticed she put out a challenge for all who dare to slow down enough to notice the blessings of each day, down to the tiniest of all.  I’ve always been one to not be in too much of a hurry, except the other day when I did move faster than normal and ended up closing the garage door on the back spare tire of my jeep.  But even in that mishap, I could see blessings. . .the non damage of my car. . .having the garage door fixed for very minimal cost. . .a sweet, patient, understanding husband who never gets rattled by these kind of mishaps.  I have always been thankful for all the blessings I see in my days.  Now I will see if I really notice all my blessings and as the number grows on my list, will I become even more observant?  How about joining me and the hundreds of others in this challenge to list blessings each day until we reach 1000?  So here I go with the beginning of my list. . .
  1. the kitchen chat with my younger son and the laughs it produced
  2. my helpful husband who teaches me so many things
  3. the hugs I received today from my sweet neighbor and friend
  4. the soft glow from our entry way lamp that makes the home look warm and cozy
  5. lunch time with one of my favorite little girl
  6. the peacefulness in our home
  7. warm flannel sheets
  8. brand new white cotton socks
  9. hearing my son come in every day yelling, "Hey Mom, I'm home!"
  10. being hugged by my big kid without asking for it
  11. texting from friends who want to share something with me or just be silly
  12. those days when the alarm clock doesn't have to go off
  13. the warmth and coziness of the fireplace
  14. phone conversations with my mother
  15. beautiful dried flowers from the country woods - these smell like maple! 
  16. memories of my grandparents farm where I had my best childhood memories
  17. photo albums to look back on and remember
  18. my sister and brother for many reasons
  19. all my friends in their individual uniqueness who are like bacon bits in a salad...they bring zing to my life
  20. prayer warriors
  21. Bible teaching, people loving, mission minded churches
  22. old hymns and new praise songs
  23. cleansing tears
  24. nose spray to use after those cleansing tears
  25. clean drinking water (not everyone has it)
  26. my own washer and dryer (I never take this for granted!)
  27. holy moments
  28. grace
  29. my church pew at the pond
  30. writing      

Friday, January 28, 2011

Beautiful Music

           Some of the most beautiful music, for me, are the sounds out in nature.  The sound of a babbling brook, crickets cricketing, cicadas chirping, roosters crowing, and when a whole field of birds starts singing all at once, it sounds like a choir. On this day the birds came alive and sang their songs.  I think they were praising.  That is not so far fetched.  Psalm 150:6 says, “Let everything that has breath, praise the Lord.”  Psalm 145:21 says, “…let every creature praise His holy name for ever and ever.”
           Why would birds praise the Father?  The answer might be found in Psalm 84:3: “Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young-a place near your altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God.”

            Why would I praise my Heavenly Father?  Because He is so worthy of it and I
am filled with gratitude for what He has done for me.  The more I learn about our mighty, awesome, all-knowing, all powerful God, about His holiness, that He knows everything about me and still wants a relationship with little ol’ me…that is worth praising.  (Psalm 139 1-4…”O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.  You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my going out and my lying down’ you are familiar with all my ways.  Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord.)   There is no other like Him; His greatness shows in His creation; He is always there for me and He doesn’t leave me where I am but keeps moving me on.  The greatest love ever shown me was by Him when He allowed His son to be mocked, tortured and killed on the cross so MY sins could be covered.  And He did this for you too.  That is worthy enough right there of praise!

For the Christian, praise is glorifying the Lord, centering our attention upon Him with our heartfelt expression of love, adoration, and thanksgiving.  It is taking our focus off of ourselves and placing it totally onto Him.  There is always something to be grateful for and He is always worthy of our praise no matter what our circumstances are.

You may say, “Yeah, but you don’t know what I’m going through.”  No, but He does and He promises to never leave us, never forsake us, to walk through the fire and waters with us, to hold us by His righteous right hand and to give us a renewed strength if we would just look to Him, to focus on Him instead of our circumstances.
I know this.  I walked through the valley of depression, my heart aching like never before because my precious first born had left and I did not know where he was. But God led me to this pond, began a work in me, and I began to focus on Him more than the circumstances. I raised my hand for Him to take and He walked through that valley with me and then led me right out. But not right away, only after a time of being with Him (a couple of years at the pond), talking to Him, listening to Him, and observing what He was showing me.  I also had to trust in what I couldn’t see, but to fully trust in Him, the one who sees all and reconciles in His timing.  I learned to trust in His plans, even if I didn’t understand.  Through this, God took my broken heart and brought it back to life with a new song in it. I entered into that valley depressed, He brought me out singing.  I entered that valley weak, He brought me out strong.  I entered that valley physically sick, He brought me out well.  Praise you Father!

I have learned that even when going through a difficult time and I did not feel like it, if I would raise my hands and voice to the Lord and pour forth from a grateful heart, my spirits were lifted. Why?  Satan loves it when we are down, because then we are weak.  But praise is also a weapon for us to use to send the enemy running, and he will. It also releases God’s power. For examples, read 2 Chronicles, chapter 20 and about Paul and Silas in prison in Acts, chapter 15:16-40.

            If you are unable to raise your voice, put on a praise tape and let it run all day.  I’ve done this myself and it only takes a few songs and I am right back where I need to be, praising Him with my own voice and heart.

            The singing and rejoicing can go in the other direction too.  I discovered that if we stay in fellowship with Him and obey His word, the Bible says He will rejoice over us with singing.  Zephaniah 3:17: “The Lord God is with you, He is mighty to save.  He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”  Did you get that last part? How awesome to think that not only can He save us, take great delight in us, can quiet us with His love, but He will rejoice over us with singing!  My heart swells just at the thought that His love for me could bring him to singing.

            I feel a song of praise coming on.  Will you join me and the birds in doing what Psalm 100:1-2 says?  “Shout for joy to the Lord…worship the Lord with gladness; come before Him with joyful songs.”

We praise Thee, O God, our Redeemer, Creator,
In grateful devotion our tribute we bring.
We lay it before Thee, we kneel and adore Thee,
We bless Thy holy name, glad praises we sing.
Julia Cady Cory

“I will praise you, O Lord, with all my heart.”
Psalm 9:1

“Praise the Lord in song, for He has done excellent things;
Let this be known throughout the Earth.”
Isaiah 9:1

Please share your thoughts about music and praising…or anything else on your mind you would like to share.  Do you have a favorite praise song, an old hymn, or do you also enjoy going out somewhere and listening to nature?  Are you more comfortable praising in a group or in solitude? Does music draw you closer to Him?
(if you do not have a blogger account, just go to blogspot.com and type in your name and a password, then you can post comments, thank you)

Sunday, January 23, 2011


Not everything is as it appears.

Our neighbor’s dog, Bella, saw this “stick” and jumped into the pond to retrieve it.  She thought it was floating, so she tried to grab but it would not move.  She tried again but it still would not move.  It was not a floating stick but actually a bush that was growing from the bottom of the pond and this was one of its branches.  The rains had raised the water and hid the bush.  The branch looked deceivingly like a floating branch to Bella.  She soon gave up.  I thought of the great deceiver, Satan, and all his schemes to fool the people in this world.
            It began all the way back to the beginning of time in the Garden of Eden.  Satan didn’t slither up to Eve and attack her with weapons to win his war.  He used something I believe was much more dangerous, subtle deceit.  He twisted and turned the truth until it sounded good to her and then the Fall happened. He turned Adam and Eve’s thinking away from God and He has been trying to do this ever since.     
There are false teachers, false teachings all over the world.  God warns us about being deceived. Matthew 24:4, “Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you.”  Ephesians 5:6, “Let no one deceive you with empty words.”  11 Thess. 2:3. “Don’t let anyone deceive you in any way.”  James 1:16, “Don’t be deceived…every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”  This is just a few of the many scriptures He gave us to warn us of deceit.
            He also gives us guidelines to go by to determine what is true and what is false: 
     1.   Do the teachings confirm scripture?
     2.   Do they speak of Jesus Christ being the Son of God who came to Earth as a man to die for our sins?
                 3.    Do these teachers live morally by God’s Word?
                 4.   Are the teachings consistent with the Bible?
            Any teaching that contradicts God’s Word is false.
            Some people say they believe part of the Bible but not all of it.  This is saying that some of it is true and some is false.  The Bible says ‘All scripture is inspired by God”, 2nd Timothy 3:16. Here are my thoughts:
            Our awesome God, Lord of Lords and King of Kings, in all His power and majesty, inspired a book for us, the Bible, with His words; His truth is God breathed. He is not going to allow falsehoods and contradictions to sit in that book next to His truths.  He banished the deceiver, the father of lies, from Heaven and from the Garden of Eden.  Do you think He would allow untruths to sit in His Word?  I don’t think so!
            He gave us the truth so we could recognize the false.  God spoke to us through His Word so that we could genuinely know Him.  Why would He confuse us with lies sitting next to His words?  This is not consistent with His character.  One of the greatest acts of love on His part was to give us Himself through His Word.  He wanted us to know Him, not to be confused.
            Some would say, “I want to have an open mind.”  Good, fill it with the truth and be careful, because Satan would love to have an open mind where there is room to fill it with his lies.  We are either for Christ or we are not.  There is no middle ground.  Christ says is Matt. 12:30, “He who is not with me is against me.”  We cannot be neutral either with Christ.  The bible says if you are, you are playing on Satan’s team and that is not a good team to be on!  You will lose!
            God gave us the truth, warned us of the false, and leaves the decision up to us.
Genesis 4:7 says, “Sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you but you must master it.”  How do we master it?  To know Truth so well, we recognize the deceiver.  We are to bring ALL things under the Lordship of Christ.  When we do this, the deceiver will flee.
            The truth has endured for centuries.  Lives have been saved, restored, and healed from the truth.  If we accept the truth, our eternal home will be with the author of truth. If we do not accept the truth, we will spend eternity in Hell with the great deceiver for all time.
            Satan, the deceiver, did not win the battle for man’s soul in the garden.  When Jesus breathed His last breathe on Calvary’s Hill, and the words were heard, “It is finished”, Christ won the victory!  Hallelujah!
            Before getting hold of certain lessons or teachings, check out the roots or what is anchoring it first.  Is it solid in the foundation of the Rock, or is it in the mud and muck, or is it so wishy-washy, it will all wash away?
            Bella saw something that appealed to her and she went for it in a flash.  When something is appealing to us as far as teachings, let’s check out the anchoring before diving in.
                                                     “Watch out that no one deceives you.” 
                                                                          Matthew 24:4

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Ebony and Ivory

I’ve often wondered why God placed my family in Kentucky eight years ago.  So many things have happened since then it’s difficult to put it all into perspective.  The stories we’ve shared, the adventures we’ve experienced have all combined to create a tapestry of life unique to this new home.  I suppose I’ve always possessed a heart for the plight of others and since moving to Kentucky I feel God has challenged me to step away from my zone of comfort and explore new avenues of expression and connection.

Seven years ago I became involved in a ‘Lunch/Hospital Ministry’ with others from my church. Once a week the sack lunches are handed out to family members who are waiting for loved ones in the intensive care areas of the local hospitals.  That simple act of kindness has generated some amazing connections to the lives of ordinary people facing trying circumstances.

It was during those times I met Miss Anna, a 90 year old cleaning lady who worked at one of the hospitals.  God brought this lady in her beautiful ebony skin into my life along side my ivory skin to blend us together into what I hope in time became beautiful music to God’s ears.  I know it was to mine.

Miss Anna touched my life in so many ways with her understated wit and accepting charms.

If you look at our picture, you will see that Ms. Anna and I are like the keys on the piano board…ebony and ivory, sitting side by side, working together in perfect harmony.  Ms. Anna and I shared so much together, especially in these last several months after she went through the loss of her leg. 

Over the months after her amputation, we shared time, smiles, food, stories, grief, laughter, and love.  The beauty of our friendship created music within my heart, giving me much joy.  But there was also beauty in the quiet moments.  It was out of the willingness to sit in the quiet, that our most beautiful conversations were born.  I learned to accept the quiet that so many find uncomfortable for I saw that love was working in the quiet.  Ms. Anna was not a big talker, but by letting the quiet moments happen, it gave her time to think, and eventually love poured out of her towards me like a beautiful song.

Ms. Anna was a real soldier.  To look at her tiny frame, you wouldn’t picture her that way.  Over time I began to ask her questions about her life and she slowly and in little pieces shared with me.  During an era of racial backwardness, she worked hard to help make a living for her family and continued to work up to the age of 90. She never once complained, had a heart of gold, and had much strength in that fragile looking body.  She loved the Lord and that is where she gained her strength. 

She had a harmony about her that few may ever find in their own lives.  A harmony like the blending of beautiful music…like a piano with its ebony and ivory notes.  Love, like music is a universal language ALL understand…hhmmm, pondering…

Several months before her amputation, Miss Anna went to the doctor to look at a growth on her foot.  It wasn’t good and no amount of treatment would cure it.  Reluctantly, she agreed with the doctors to have her leg amputated…fully expecting to return to work as soon as she could get up and about.  Initially her spirits remained high and when I would visit her in the hospital she would light up, but over time her spirit began to fade.

Eventually they moved her to a nursing home and even though I visited her every week, I could tell her spirit was declining even more. When she was told she would never be able to go back to work, she lost her will to go on. This week, a year ago the Lord brought her home.

I’ve known Ms. Anna for almost 7 years but it wasn’t until this last year  she gave me a nickname.  I was so tickled the first time she called me Baby Doll. . .it was also the first time she said she loved me.  A nurse at the nursing home asked one day while I was there how Ms. Anna and I met.  Ms. Anna piped right up saying that we had fallen in love with each other years ago at the hospital. I am so blessed that we could hold hands, eat together, share our stories, pray together to the same God who created us both and loves us both, sacrificed for both of us, and has prepared a home for both of us with Him. Maybe we can sit on each others porches.  Or, she could skip to a pond with me if there is one.

Just coming off of Martin Luther King Jr. Day, I can’t help but be saddened at thinking of all the past dissention between ebonies and ivories.  Many never learned how to blend together to live in harmony.  Many beautiful moments were lost, or never happened because one could not see the beauty of the other. I believe and hope it is much better today and will continue so one does not lose out on their own beautiful song God may have for them.

I love old hymns, and there is an old negro spiritual that I found recently that I believe puts our relationship into perspective.

In Christ There Is No East or West

In Christ there is no east or west, in Him no South or North; but one great fellowship of love through-out the whole side earth.

In Him shall true hearts everywhere their high communion find; His service is the golden cord, close binding all mankind.

Join hands, then, brothers of the faith( and sisters too) what-e’er your race may be; who serves my Father as a son is surely kin to me.

In Christ now meet both east and west, In Him meet south and north; all Christly souls are one in Him, through-out the whole wide earth.  Amen.

Ms. Anna, Our souls are one in Him. . .You were a beautiful song!
We will meet again. . .I love you
Your Baby Doll

Friday, January 14, 2011


(I may get flack for this, but this is my blog, so I am taking liberty to speak.  Please feel free to comment)

The latest news is that zodiac signs have changed after hundreds of years and if you have been a Pisces or Sagittarius or any of the other astrological signs all your life, you may be something different now because of the alignment of the stars.  Is this something I care about, whether I’m a Pisces or not?  No, but I do care about all the people who follow their sign and read their horoscope every day. 

The purpose of the horoscope is to gain insight in a person’s character and foretell the future.  What distresses me is that most major newspapers have a horoscope column and even more so is that a lot of Christians read their horoscopes.  Why? We cannot determine God’s will for our life with a horoscope, but only through His Word and a consistent relationship with God himself.  His Word even forbids things like this in many places, old and New Testament alike.

God is our source of faith, wisdom, and guidance.  Do we really want to dishonor Him by reading some writing by who knows who?  (I know, someone may be saying right now, “well, I’m reading you and I don’t know you).  Yes, but my prayer is that whatever you read here steers you to Him and what He says.

I see horoscopes as another one of those subtle weapons of Satan – trying to steal the faith away from God.  Some may say this is absurd, but most of the ways Satan works is with subtlety.  You never see it coming, you never see it happening until something big happens and then you wonder, what happened?  Please don’t delute your faith because of the entertainment value in this.  If a storm enters your life, believe me, He will sustain you, carry you through it, breathe his love on you, and help you to carry on.  A horoscope cannot do that for you!

In writing this, to be fair, I looked up the sign that was supposed to be me, Pisces, to see what it said.  It was right on, describing me almost to a T.  Does this impress me?  No.  My God, my creator, knows all about me, even down to the number of hairs on my head.  The horoscope could not tell me that.  Someone may ask, is that so important?  I say, YES!  If he knows me so well as to know the hair count on my head, he knows me more intimately than anyone else, He knows my heart, my thinking, the very fibers of my being.  He knows my DNA, He created our laminin. . .( if you don’t know what this is, watch the DVD, How Great is Our God, by Louie Giglio, it will knock your socks off)! He sacrificed like no other for me.  If I want to know more about me and my future, I don’t need to turn the newspaper pages; I only need to turn to the One who knows me best, inside and out, laminin and all!  He knows and loves me and you so much He sacrificed the most.  In return, I will look to Him for my everything, to Him I will praise, love, adore and honor.  Oh, you cannot do that with a newspaper column or the internet.

So am I a Pisces or not?  It doesn’t matter in the least to me.  Am I a child of God?  An emphatic YES!  When I enter my heavenly home, I will not be asked what my sign was, but will be able to tell them I am a daughter of the King, whom I tried to serve my best, not because I had to, but because I wanted to.

Horoscopes are not God breathed, but His Word is.  You want to know who you are, where you’re going, what’s in your future?  Instead of reaching for that zodiac column, reach for your Bible and remember what Second Timothy says. . . “All scripture is breathed out by God and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.” Again, astrologers and newspapers do not not know our future, only God.  "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Jeremiah 29:11 

(If you read the horoscopes and are a Christian, please don’t think I’m saying you’re not one.  I’m not.  Just food for thought…you are free to walk away or pursue it more on your own.  Thank you for coming and please come back)

Monday, January 10, 2011

Holy Breathing; Learning to Breathe

(Today is a special lady's birthday.  She went to be with the Lord almost a year from now, I believe last March.  During this time I was in Tulsa, Ok. taking care of my sick mother for three weeks.  I was so praying for my mom, my tired self, and then for Lynne and her family and friends back home after I heard the news.  I woke up one night at my mothers, and wrote this story. . .)

I guess I’ve been thinking a lot about breathing lately.  I have been taking care of my mother for the last three weeks and have been watching her breathe into a plastic device to strengthen her lungs.

Last week, a sweet lady from my church passed away.  That night I prayed, asking the Lord to breathe on this family His comfort, to breathe strength into them to pass through the grieving process, to breathe the wonderful memories of her over her husband, sons, and friends that would make them smile.  I found myself afterwards humming an old hymn titled, Breathe on Me.  I thought how this dear lady had taken her last earthly breath but was more alive than ever in her eternal home with her Savior face to face.

In Genesis, we read where God breathed into the nostrils of Adam and gave him physical life.  Years later, God’s Son, Jesus, gave His life on the cross.  When He breathed His last breath on that cross, He was giving us a chance to have eternal life with Him and His Father.

The giver of life who breathed into Adam has also breathed into me…breathed boldness and courage into a very timid and shy girl…breathed comfort into a hurting and grieving girl and later into this middle aged woman.  He breathed onto me compassion when it was needed.  He breathed His words into me when I needed them.  With His breath I have heard His voice.

When my mom uses her breathing device, she actually has to inhale, then lets the air out.  When she inhales, the little blue ball rises.  What are we inhaling?  I have been known to inhale the air of discouragement, confusion, doubt and fear.  When I do this, I am not fully trusting in my Savior.  This kind of breathing can raise our blood pressure, give us headaches, raise our risk of heart attacks, and can choke the life right out of us.

As I grow older, hopefully more mature, I am learning to pray as the song goes…”Breathe on me, breath on me Holy Spirit, breath on me.  Take my heart, cleanse every part, breathe on me.”  When I let my will be lost in Him; to live for Him alone, then I breathe a deep sigh of relief, trusting all things to Him trusting in Him alone.

When we breathe in the fragrance of the Lord, our spirits are raised, our hearts grow more for others, our frowns turn upside down.  When my mom lets the air out, the little blue ball drops.  When we breathe in and out the fragrance of the Lord and let Him breathe on us, the weight of doubt, fear, discontentment, anger, etc. drops.  When He and we are breathing together, it’s like Him taking the weight of the world off our shoulder and we can breathe a sigh of relief.

Another old hymn came to mind, “Breathe on Me, Breath of God.”  The last verse goes…”Breathe, breath of God, so shall I never die.  But live with Thee the perfect life of Thine eternally.”  The sweet lady from my church is now living the perfect life with her Heavenly Father.  I could let myself be envious, but I won’t. My time will come when the Father says.  And living on the Earth with the Father breathing on me is an awesome way to live down here.  So I wait patiently in this earthly home of mine continuing to breathe my Lord in, continuing to have Hi breathe His holy breath on me until all this earthly part of me “glows with Thy fire divine.”

My sweet mother has recently gone through two surgeries, dealing wit a 5” incision the doctor did not close up (this has been an ordeal in of itself), complications from the surgeries, pneumonia, ten hours in the ER, and a third hospital admission.  Tiredness sets in for both of us, but God continues to breathe on us, refreshing me and giving her strength to continue on being her sweet self, smiling her sweet smile, and still having the strength to give me orders to go home and rest!

From what I have read about the lady from my church, she must have learned how to breathe and how to allow the Lord to breathe on her.  And from other writings I have seen on the computer, the people around her and her family in that last week also had the Holy breath on them.

In this world of bad news and scary stories, is it not a breather of fresh air to feel the holy breath of God, knowing He is right by our side to walk us through whatever life brings?  Come on, breathe deeply and feel the holy breath of God on you.  Makes you smile, doesn’t it? 

Dear Lynne,
You and I were JUST getting to know each other when I had to leave for Oklahoma.  Then you left for your heavenly home.  Some day I will be there and maybe we can sit by a pond, or on a porch and start back up with each other.  That is, if I can get in line of all the people that will want to be doing the same thing  :)  Happy Birthday! 

Friday, January 7, 2011


As I sit by the pond in the late afternoon, the shadows begin to appear.  There is a peace and a smile across my face as I remember the Psalm 17:8 which says,
            “Hide me in the shadow of Your wings.”  My bible’s footnote says that He protects us but also at times has a greater purpose for us to go through the pain, but even then, He protects us by guiding us through the pain or difficulty.  Either way, we are in the shadow of His wings.
            Psalm 91:1 reads,
            “We will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”  By dwelling with the Lord continually trusting in Him, we can rest and be kept safe in the shadow of the Almighty.
            Then there is Isaiah 51:16, which says, “I have put my words in your mouth and covered you with the shadow of my hand.”  This verse meant a lot to me at the time in my life when I felt convicted to join an evangelism ministry at my church.  This very quiet, non-articulate, afraid of confrontation girl was going to go visit strangers in their home and share the gospel. Sometimes praying with them which was so out of my comfort zone at that time.  But then I read Isaiah 51:16, which said to me that God would put his words in my mouth!
            Here was a huge test for me.  Was I going to trust Him, rest in Him and go forth into the huge “uncomfortable zone?”  Yes, I did.  His promise as all of them, are trustworthy.  He put His words in my mouth every time and I knew from that first outreach visit I could relax, breathe, and totally rest in Him. Satan did not like this and every Monday night just before I would begin my visits, he would put fear into me.  But I just stomped my foot and said that I was a daughter of the King and He was in control.  I would tell that ol’ devil to just flee in the name of Jesus, and he did. I experienced wonderful visits every time.  How freeing to let the fears go and just rest in His shadow while He takes control.
            What fears do you have right now?  If you are feeling uneasy because of circumstances surrounding you, surrender those fears and circumstances to Him.  Let go and let God take control.
            When you are outside, look for the shadows and smile, relax, and know that you are either hidden in the shadow of His wings, or covered with the shadow of His hand, while He guides and lead you through whatever you’re going through.
            And remember, as believers, when our time on this earth comes to an end and we will walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil, and we will be comforted, because we are in the Almighty, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, blessed, beautiful shadow.

“Surely goodness and love will follow me (just like a shadow…),
All the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Psalm 23:6

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Rest (2009)

During this period of my life, I felt I was for the first time, starting to understand what “resting in the Lord” really meant.  I had heard that term so many of my years as a Christian, but never fully comprehended what it meant until now.  I don’t think anyone can until something shakes their world and then you become determined to learn from it.
Having a prodigal son is what shook my world and I needed my Lord like never before.  Suffering many, many days and nights of unrest caused me to become physically ill.  My trips to the pond gave me peace and I eventually started to feel rest in my soul, knowing I was relying on God’s strength, not my own.  I wanted to dig deeper into this kind of resting though.  Here is what I discovered…
Psalm 91:1 – “He who dwells in the shelter of the most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”  Each time I went to the pond, I relaxed. I went seeking out my Lord and rested in the presence of His shadow.
Matthew 11:28-29 – “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”  I took His Word and learned from Him, gave Him my burdens lightening my load, was drawing nearer to Him and was finding rest for my soul.
I rest in the fact that I am His child and He will never leave me.  His strength is much more powerful than mine will ever be so I’ve learned to rest in His strength, not my own.  He is an all knowing God.  I know nothing, so I rest in His knowledge.  His timing is perfect, so I rest on His time table.  My prodigal son and I are His children, so I rest in our salvation.
When worry overwhelms us, we have a choice to make.  It’s like standing at the crossroads mentioned in Jeremiah 6:16, “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”
Worry is from the enemy and he would love to pull you down the other path.  When he tries this with me, I now stomp my feet as if I’m stomping on him and say ‘NO!”.  I take the good way, the path of God and find rest once again.
Now I say with David as he is quoted in Psalm 62:1, “My soul finds rest in God alone.”  Why?  Verse 2…”He alone is my Rock and my Salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken.
I echo David’s words from Psalm 16:9, “Therefore, my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices, my body also will rest secure.”  Why?  Verse8, “I have set the Lord before me.  Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
So when thinking of my sweet son, not knowing where or how he is, I know he is in the Lord’s care.  The Lord has his eye on him.  I trust my son to His care. I can let go because my Lord is holding on. I will not be shaken.  And I am at rest.
If we can learn to trust Him with everything, even our children, we will win the victory over worry and unrest.
I say rest assured, rest on that!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Wounds (written in 2009)

            On many of my first trips to the pond, I sat out there nursing my emotional wounds. My precious first born son, after the age of 18, left home, family and everything good God had blessed him with.  I was hurt and for a good year I sat in a pit wallowing in my misery.  (That story is coming later.) 
            I know my son must have wounds.  I’ve tried to understand but still do not at this point.             I feel others lured him away with their words and lifestyles that do not honor God.  We tried to reason with him in the beginning but he wanted to listen and be with them instead of us.  It seems the more we talked and loved him, the more he turned towards the others.  This brings to my mind Proverbs 27:6,
            “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
            Here is what the footnote in the bible says about this:
            Who would prefer a friend’s wounds to an enemy’s kisses?  Anyone who considers the source.  A friend (or family), who has your best interest at heart may have to give you unpleasant advice at times, but you know it is for your own good.  An enemy, by contrast, may whisper sweet words and happily send you on your way to ruin.  We tend to hear what we want to hear, even if an enemy is the only one who will say it.  A friend’s advice, no matter how painful, is much better.
            Satan, the ultimate enemy is such a deceiver.  He has disguised us, the family, as the enemy to stay away from and our son’s friends as the true friends, even though he is withering in their presence.
But I do not nurse my wounds anymore. God used a lot of people, things, and places to bring healing to my heart, the pond being one of those places. God has helped me to let go of trying to understand and I’ve learned to put my total trust and understanding in the Lord who I know is watching over him.  I have surrendered my prodigal into His loving care.  Yes, there is still a pocket of sadness in my heart and I miss my son terribly, but God has brought healing and joy in so many ways.
If the God of the Universe can meet me each time at a small pond behind my house and show me His love through the heart on a tree, remind me of who He is through a rock, remind me of His character through the tadpoles, show me He is watchful of me as He is to the birds of the air, how can I stay sorrowful.  I am loved beyond understanding and so is my son.  If God meets me at a pond, He will meet my son wherever and whenever he is ready.  I know my son will be alright, because he is under the watchful eyes of His Heavenly Father as he is in the shadow of His wings.
In the healing, scars emerge. Whether emotional or physical, these scars are not to be ashamed of.  Wherever there is a scar, there is a testimony.  The scars represent beauty, not ugliness.  I believe God wants us to share those scars, those testimonies, so others can gain courage to do the same.
When I visit the pond now, I come to worship my Lord and Savior, Yahweh-Rophe, the healer of wounded hearts.  I am healed in more ways than one because of the wounds of another.  And His scars are the most beautiful!

“But He was pierced for our transgressions,
He was crushed for our iniquities’
The punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
And by his wounds we are healed.
Isaiah 53:5

            Thank you Lord Jesus!